General:
- Glory to God in the Highest (published: Tabor Voice, Nov-Dec 2002; Divine Light, Dec 2003)
- Living in the Will of God (published: Tabor Voice, Jan-Feb 2003)
- What we should do this Lent (published: The Examiner, March 2003)
- Lost your reputation? Rejoice! (published: Divine Light, July 2004)
- The Potter & His Clay - A Spiritual Analogy
- Death on an Easter Sunday
- How Jesus saved us from the fire next door
- God isn't deaf
- Get on a Barnabus trip
- A Year Older and a lot less Wise (Part 1 of the Birthday Trilogy)
- He sang to me (Part 2 of the Birthday Trilogy)
- The Value of Intercession (Part 3 of the Birthday Trilogy)
- Do you want a FREE GIFT that can never be taken from you?! (Dec 2003 / Jan 2004)
- Love is in the air... (February 2004)
- Was it worth it all? (March 2004)
- I Confess... (April 2004)
- The Beautiful Blessing of Christian Fellowship! (May 2004)
- Power Evangelize! (June 2004)
- 'Best Friends' till the end (July 2004)
- Family Matters (August 2004)
- Do you know WHY you believe? (September 2004)
- You're going to be let down (October 2004)
- Praying with the Holy Pope (November 2004)
- Hang in there (December 2004) (published: Divine Light, Jan 2005)
- Just like that. And you're gone (January 2005)
- The Divine Lover of My Soul (February 2005)
- Is it ever "too late" to do right? (March 2005)
- To Emmaus, or back again? The choice is yours! (April 2005) (published:Divine Truth, April 2007)
- Bear Much Fruit (May 2005) (published: Divine Light, July 2005)
- Holiness and the Heart of Love (June 2005)
- Spiritual Boot Camp (July 2005)
- Abundant Life! (August 2005)
- Unanswered Prayers? (September 2005)
- Trust in the Lord! (October 2005)
- Persevere! (December 2005)
- New Resolutions this New Year (January 2006)
- 'Having it All' = Having Jesus (February 2006)
- He Understands (April 2006)
- My Invisible Tattoo (September 2006)
- Cardinal Justin Rigali ~ "Glorify God in Your Body" (October 2006)
- A Fattened Calf for me (December 2006)
- How to come out of a Spiritual Downward Spiral - Part 1 (January 2007)
- Jesus is Alive. Need Proof? ( October 2007)
- Biblical Catholics (November 2007)
- Religion or Spirituality? (September 2008)
- Lessons from the strange race between the Tortoise and the Hare (October 2008)
- How to react when Spiritual Leaders fall / backslide: (November 2008)
December 2006
A Fattened Calf* for me.
To all that come by here every month, to all that I've preached retreats to, to all my family, to all my friends, to even the stranger-friend who lands here just 'by chance'...
I write this months column with the hands of a child who has walked to the ends of the earth and who has come back to the loving hands of an ever forgiving unconditionally loving Father.
I started this year off with a simple prayer for me and for everyone I knew "Lord, may we get closer to You this year".
This prayer meant a lot of me especially since this year I would celebrate 10 years of being born again of the Spirit (April 25th 1996 - 2006).
And yet - the year turned out to be the very worst year I have experienced since meeting the Lord.
I don't know how many times I 'bothered' to get into chapel and pray this year - they were very very few and far between.
I don't know how many times I read my Bible before sleeping at night - and this was something I would religiously do - it was so ingrained in me, and yet, somehow this year it was not happening.
I tried to continue my regular ministries - I preached one retreat this year, I ministered at various places, I tried so hard to write the month column at Glorify God (managed only 6 out of 12 finally).
But through it all, I was struggling. I struggled even as I was telling people what they should do. Preaching to them. Teaching them. Councelling them. Writing to them. While I myself, was failing.
Hypocrite.
Yes, that's what I felt like... like the world's worst hypocrite. I identified with St. Paul when he said, "for what I would, that do I not; but what I hate, that do I" (Romans 7:15)
It's been a hard year for me. A year which I walked further and further away from Him.
But it's not been a year without rainbows either.
I have persevered. Every time I have fallen, He's given me the grace to get up one more time. To try one more time. To continue walking. To persevere. His grace, which was all I had, was indeed sufficient for me.
Last week as I sat praying, the Lord spoke to me, He told me - "I would kill the fatted calf for you Melody, again and again.
Everytime, every single time, you return to me, there is rejoicing in heaven."
As I thought about the many many times this year I had fallen and then come back to the Lord, full of good intentions only to run away again, the spoilt prodigal daughter that I was - my heart broke.
I know that my Father, waited each time, even when I turned to sin instead of Him, He waited for my return. He in His omniscience knew that I would again sin, but He still killed the fatted calf for me whenI returned
He still rejoiced to have me back in His arms... if only for that brief moment until I sinned again.
How much He loves me! This I shall truly never comprehend.
When I was a little girl I had a theory on friendship. I figured that two friends who fought but somehow got over that, were much closer than friends who had never fought. There was something in the reuniting of spirits that I understood even as a young girl.
As I look back at this 'failed' spiritual year of mine, I realise one thing, in coming back to Him each time, in being welcomed back by Him each time (with fatted calf!), I have indeed grown closer to Him each time.
As this year ends, do join me in praising and thanking our God Who always answers all prayers, Who loves unconditionally, Who forgives unconditionally. And Who never fails.
Remember, He is faithful even when we're not.
May you have a Joyful Christmas and may 2007 be filled with the Holy Spirit,
December 2006
* The fatted calf signifies the best that the Father can give - not only a welcome back, but a welcome back according to all His riches and glory. Read Luke 15:11-32 for the entire story.
